Picture Motivation

I have been in a terrible slump. I can not seem to stick to any plans I make. I have no self control. It is just pathetic. I can do better. I will do better. I remember this past summer how good I felt. I am a pretty shy person in general and when I was at my highest weight I saw it causing me to seclude myself more. When I was at my lowest in the summer I felt confident, I smiled more and was a happier person. I saw a change in myself, I opened myself up more and wasn't so worried about what people thought of me. I need to get back on track. When I am eating healthy I feel so good. When I eat crappy I have no motivation and feel terrible with zero energy. I wanted to post some pictures to show some of the results I have seen in the past year. 

These two pictures are from our trip to Hawaii last February. I seriously love that place! Magical. 

In these pictures I had lost 15 pounds..

Then by the Summer I had lost a total of 39 pounds. I can really see it in my arms. And I can tell you I felt the loss all over. It was amazing. 

A great moment was when I decided to try on my wedding dress. I got down to my wedding day weight and had to give it a try and it fit like a glove!

Well there ya go. My first personal picture post. I have a ways to go but it is great motivation to see what I have done so far.

Two big holidays are coming up, Christmas and New Years. These holidays usually involve lots of food and goodies. I am making a goal to not over do it. Control my portions and stay within my allowed calories for the day. I can do this!!

Week one Progress

Studying for tomorrow's final and nursing a sick baby back to health (on top of dance, work, math night at school, family home eveing, housework) has kept me from posting. But wanted to report that on Monday I weighed in at 270.8. Down 4 lbs. Doesn't seem like much but awfully better than gaining 4.

And can some one tell me why if I gain 4 lbs I can feel it in my clothes and see it on my body but when I lose 4, I dont think my clothes feel better or see it leave my body?  Just doesn't seem right does it?????


Still diligent. Avoiding triggers. Working out each day somehow, some way. Need to work on getting necessary rest.

Friday, I have been asigned to take treats to work for the 12 days of Christmas.  Can you believe that....really, a full twelve days that I get to fight my obsessions, deal with triggers and resist such beautiful things that my coworkers will bring in.  What do you suggest?  Low calorie or Low carb....low sugar?

Enjoy the journey!!

Saturday- Ready, Set, Go

I won't be weighing myself today.  Last night we attended my sister's Christmas party at the church for kids.  They served pizza, chips, fresh veggies and a slew of cookies and candy.  I indulged in a few cookies and caramel chocolates.  I really have to learn how to handle eating in a group setting.  I get anxiety even.  More on that another time.

Today I am starting the day with yoga.  I love the way I feel centered, restored and energized after a great yoga session.  Olaya is still asleep so maybe I can actually finish the entire routine.  After that, today we have Bountiful Basket pickup, Belle will be performing at the festival of trees, I have to isolate myself at the computer lab on campus to catch up on some paper writing and then hopefully make it to the gym in the evening for a elliptical cardio workout.  After that I would like to play Just Dance 2 with the kids for our family time.  Really just want to cuddle up with a Christmas movie and snuggle my little bugs.  Maybe we will save that for tomorrow after church.

Keeping up the energy is key today.  Hope everyone gets a chance to take care of you today.

Motivation Quickie

Not much time to write tonight.  Had my grad class and I am spent.  But just wanted to put up a motivation for tomorrow.  I have been thinking about this as I wake up.  When I don't make it to the gym all I have gained is one hour of sleep and a lot of negative self talk. I know Avril and I grumble as we walk in the gym but we are crazy happy as we walk out.

Wasn't Expecting That

Day 4 at the gym....getting easier to get out of bed.  Avril doesn't have to text me orders to get up.  Excited to get up all the way until I walked out the front door.  It is going to be hard to not only leave my bed but walk out in below freezing temperatures.  Thinking this may be the year I can justify a remote car start for the Suburban.

I will write more about this tonight, but I want to share a short clip of the class Avril and I stumbled upon today.  It is Body Pump.



 

Even as I was thrilled to push my body through the exercises, something different was happening.  My emotionally body responded in ways I wasn't prepared for.  There I was in the back of the room, tears streaming down my face.  Not is a blubbering, sobbing way.  It felt more like a cleanse. 

I have to get back to work, on my lunch break, but I wanted to get this out there and hear from anyone else that may have the same thing happen.  I have some ideas about why this happened but I am new to all of this.  What do you think?

Do you ever cry through a really great physical workout?

Whats for Dinner

I love finding healthy versions of foods I love. Here is what is on the menu for dinner tonight...Buffalo Chicken Rolls

 

You can find the simple recipe here at the Can You Stay For Dinner Blog.

I will probably be using a different cheese not a big fan of blue cheese and maybe get some light ranch for dipping.  Yum, can't wait.

Update-Made these with Mexican blend cheese. Used Lite blue cheese dressing to dip but sure enough I can not stand blue cheese. So I did not use any dip after that. Ranch would be good, I just did not want the extra calories.  These turned out really good and were so easy to make. That's my kind of dinner. 

What Have I Learned

I was hoping Sharen would post that quote about "Nothing tastes as good as thin feels." I know food is such an issue for me. I enjoy the smell of it, the feel of it, the way it brings people together, the sounds of joy people make when they eat my food…..so much of it is so good. Yet, the thing I have been avoiding is the reaction it has on my body. I think I have been more in the school of "Live to eat instead of eat to live." So the last few days….it has been coming on for a while…I have tried to ask does this taste as good as the goal I want to reach? Not to mention, I don't want to destroy the success I started my day with, day three of the gym.
 Today I almost didn't make it to the gym. Olaya woke a few times last night crying out. Worried she was having nightmares, when my alarm clock went off I text Avril, my workout buddy, that I would not be going to the gym today. Even as I sent the words, I shuttered with the idea that I wasn't going to have my one hour. I wasn't going to have my fall back if the day went bad to say no matter what I gave myself this time. I am learning to remember there are no excuses. Get to the gym.

Today was a fast and furious day at work. Starting the day with three children's dental appointments left me feeling like I was running behind all day. I worked through lunch. I am frustrated with my lack of planning. We got out of the house without breakfast as we rushed to the dentist. By the time we were done, everyone was hungry and we were rushing back to get kids to school, Olaya to daycare and me to work. In comes McDonald's. UGH!! I got the kids a sausage mcmuffin, hash browns, and a sausage burrito. I got me a fruit and yogurt parfait. Sadly after eating my yogurt, I gobbled up the leftover burrito and ¼ of a mcmuffin. What is with me and not being able to throw food away? It happened before I even knew what I had done. Being on the go is hard on me. I feel forced to eat bad things. However, I did try to make up for it the rest of the day. Sadly I worked through lunch but had a hardboiled egg during my afternoon break. Again, tonight was me running carpool for the littles to kid gym, scouts', basketball practice all after picking up Olaya from day care. You have no idea how tempted I was to pick something up. I scanned the restaurants on Yellowstone and was overwhelmed with shame. I can't give my kids crap. We came home, quickly made simple sandwiches with leftover baked ham served with fresh veggies. How easy was that? Why do I think I have to feed my family a five course meal for dinner? Do I feel guilty from being gone from them all day? And can you believe after I finished half of mine I was full. In other news…..no I won't list my food intake every day. This blog itself is a journey. I hope it is a place to find support and inspiration. I encourage readers to leave comments. Give me tips. Tell me what has worked for you. Give me tips for the gym, menu planning, avoiding triggers. ANYTHING!!! My sister Sharen is a huge inspiration. She has already had great success making me want to reach my goals all the more.


I am feeling good. Realizing I am only three days into this, I can already see measurable progress. I am more alert during the day. I am more positive. My appetite has gone down. People have already responded with encouragement and want to get started with us. This journey is not a one man show. It is all of us. A network of love and support. I am seeing the scale move already. Posting weight will only happen once a week but I can see the numbers moving. YIPEE!!! So off to bed with me. Let the comments begin. Over 100 hits since the last post. Spread the word. Join the site. Share this journey with us.


Love ya,
Tara